I blinked and it’s Christmas

I write a lot about positivity over here, mostly because I feel like there isn’t enough of it and life is hard. In most cases, I need a dose of it myself. Over the time I’ve had this blog, I’ve learned that one of the things I’m pretty decent at is stepping back and looking at the big picture and then giving myself advice. Taking that advice? That’s hit or miss… but I try! The biggest piece of advice I gave to myself in 2017: stay positive.

You guys, it’s been a heck of a year. I’ve seen a lot, and have grown a lot and I can say with certainty that I’m coming out of this past year a hell of a lot stronger than I use to be.

I went back into the archives and re-read this post and reflected on the whole thing again:

I remember this week last year so perfectly. We were planning on hosting Christmas Eve at our house, were excited and overwhelmed but knew it’d be great. We were bringing multiple families together that don’t typically spend Christmas together and THAT felt good. We had cleaned, prepped, purchased all the goods and were ready. But everything changed.

On December 23rd we had a half day at work so I was anxious to head home, pick up Dane and start our weekend. But it all flipped on it’s head when I got a call from my sister saying we needed to get to Madison asap – Dad was in the hospital with pneumonia (a side effect of his treatments) and it wasn’t looking good. I think I held my breath for that entire drive…

Walking into that waiting room was one of the scariest moments of my life. By the looks on everyone’s faces – I thought maybe we were too late. I remember falling to the ground and the rest is kind of a blur. It’s so weird, I remember very specific pieces of the next 24 hours and not much else. Dane eating oranges and smashing cheerios into the carpeting, how hot my feet were and my regret for wearing jeans versus leggings, the snow falling peacefully all night, the call from my dad’s doctor at 11pm, exhaling, the fire alarms at 4:30am, fear, relief, JOY, delirious laughter, bonding time with my mom, brother and sister… We literally lived hour to hour that night.

Needless to say, Christmas last year was NOT what we were expecting, which is why we’re having a re-do. Like rewinding a tape, we’ve got the house cleaned and prepped, we’re expecting a lot of family and are beyond excited that my dad will be in attendance, and likely gobbling up all of the sweets and ice cream we have on hand.

In the post I shared above, I talked about some goals for 2017:

“I’m taking 2017 day by day, and appreciating each challenge that comes my way. I’m setting goals for a healthier lifestyle, a fresh outlook and a more brave way of living. I’m also going to write more about coping, moving on and staying positive.specifically living a braver lifestyle.”

I think I finally accomplished a New Years resolution, folks.

Merry Christmas, make it count and don’t take anything for granted. Love you all.


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Wisconsin wife and mama to Dane (4) and expecting baby girl in May. Navigating life post-cancer. Lover of food, red wine and laughs. Forever grateful for my wonderful life.

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